Category: Intended Parenthood

Personal Development Guide for Surrogate Mothers

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As a surrogate mother, personal development can be confusing to initiate given the complexity of the human psyche. This article is developed to guide you in the right path and give you easy to implement tips that will boost your personal development goals as a surrogate.

For starters, surround yourself with positive people. They are sure to bring a lot of positive energy that will definitely stabilize any negative energy you get from people who aren’t as encouraging of your self-improvement aspirations.

Take advantage of breaks. Whenever you find yourself in a rut, take a breather. It will help you see things in a better light and get your brain working again. Taking regular breaks is good because it gives you the chance to recharge your mind, so when you resume work, you’ll be able to get a whole lot more done.

Keep a journal with you so whenever thoughts hit, you can jot them down.  As a surrogate mother, this is precisely a good idea as this will allow you to keep track of changes or moods that you might want to take note of. Bring some paper with you when you go out. Write down your idea in detail, and then utilize it at a later time when you can expand on the issue.

Exercising is another useful tip. Not only will it keep your body fit but will make you feel good about yourself. This is beneficial for surrogate mothers who is must always feel happy and positive.

Last but not the least, do a self check. Ask yourself questions that will help you reassess the way you approach life and how you can do better. Look over your own past experiences. Which events had the most impact on the way you live your life? What transformations have occurred thanks to these events? Thinking deeply about these issues as a surrogate mom can bring awareness and appreciation that are critical to your personal well being.

Tips for Gestational Carriers

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As a gestational carrier, nutrition is key to ensuring a healthy surrogate and baby.

Eating the right kinds of food in the right portion helps in achieving overall nutrition. The ideal split would be 15-20% for protein, 30% for fats, and 50-55% for carbs. This ensures that your body and the baby are both getting everything needed for proper growth and development. Any diets that have high amounts or extremely low amounts of the nutrients deprive your body of what it needs.

Don’t forget to eat fruits and vegetables, particularly those that are easy to digest. An example is Avocado, which is full of taste and nutrition. Nuts are great snack choices. Almonds are a great example of healthy nuts. It’s a good source of fiber and helps satisfy your appetite in between meals. Nuts in general, are healthy as long as eaten in moderation.

Storing frozen vegetables is another great idea as a gestational carrier. Freezing vegetables prevents them from spoiling faster and having a good supply guarantees you constant possession of  quick, convenient and most of all, healthy food options. These create a terrific enhancement to any type of food and works great as a side dish, dessert and even as the main entrée.

Altering your diet may be challenging at first, but is most certainly worth every bite. Nutritious food will give your body as well as the baby, all it requires to develop properly. Keep these tips in mind as you change towards a healthier eating habit.

Top Tips for A Surrogate Mom

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There is so much information you must learn during the whole process of surrogacy. Every part of your life is affected by the decision that you make as a surrogate mother. It is only normal to feel overwhelmed by all of the information and the tips below will help you have a happier and healthier surrogate journey.

Listen to your body. Some surrogates will find that they need more sleep when they are a gestational carrier, and others will find that some foods no longer agree with them. Don’t force your body to do something that it clearly does not want to do. Being able to listen to what you need will help you as a surrogate mother to feel better and less stressed.

Try exercise classes that are designed for surrogate mothers. Staying active is very important during the whole surrogacy experience, but it is also important that you exercise safely. Going to a class that is specifically created for surrogates means that you will gain all the benefits of the exercise without doing any damage to the growing baby.

As a surrogate mother, when riding in a vehicle that has air bags, make sure that the seat is pushed back as far as possible away from the dashboard. Air bags can be dangerous to an unborn child even to children who sit up front. The best solution is to check first before boarding a vehicle and simply just sit further away from it.

Sleeping on the left side of your body is a good idea in your third trimester as a surrogate mother. This position gives your baby the best supply of blood possible, and increases the circulation to your uterus and kidneys much easier as compared to lying on your right side. Back sleeping is probably the least favorable position with regards to adequate blood flow.

As a surrogate mother, you must try your best to be stress-free. Learn relaxation techniques and make sure to practice them at least once a day. Having some time to relax with breathing and calming exercises will help you feel good about yourself.

Remember to abide by the wishes of the mother to be. She together with the intended father, are well aware of what is best for you and the baby. While you cannot control genetic problems or issues you can control what you put into your body. Follow your doctor’s advice and when in doubt about something be sure to ask both the doctor and the intended parents for guidance.

Surrogate Compensation

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Surrogate Compensation 

When one decides to become a surrogate, the compensation is the least of her priorities. Although this may not be the leading concern for the surrogate, she is still worthy of the right payment for all her hard work.

Surrogate Compensation: Costs for Support Service

Surrogacy expenses vary coming from clinic to clinic. Fees for application for desired moms and dads typically work upwards of around $500 (five hundred U.S. Dollars), while legal costs commonly get to $15,000. Take note that these costs do not go straight to the surrogate mother, but go in the direction of guaranteeing that she and also the desired moms and dads are secured financially.

Surrogate Compensation: Surrogate Charge

A surrogate’s work is identical to taking an all time job, thus intended moms and dads commonly compensate the surrogate with a cash fee money expense, which is predisposed in the contract before the surrogate becomes pregnant.

A first time surrogate can earn roughly about $25,000 to $35,000, while a surrogate who has gone through this process in the past can expect a higher amount.

Surrogate Compensation and Various Other Costs

As mentioned previously, the medical expenses of the surrogate mother are already covered by the intended parents. This includes, but is not limited to, visits to the ob gyn as well as other clinical treatment important for surrogate’s overall wellness. A surrogate need not worry as her overall well-being is covered. To better illustrate this point, a good example would be if a surrogate mother is kicked out from her home. Financing will be provided through the intended couple to protect her lifestyle.

Understanding Surrogacy in Wisconsin

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One of the many factors to consider in opting for Surrogacy Services is the pay that the surrogate is entitled to. Whether it is a traditional or gestational procedure, you as the future parent must be well informed of your financial obligation to the woman acting as the surrogate mother.

The distinguishing factor between these two procedures is the resulting genetic link or lack thereof between the surrogate and the child. Traditional Surrogacy involves artificial insemination or IVF wherein the surrogate’s eggs are combined with the semen of the donor, thus resulting to a genetic connection and can be a high risk. Meanwhile, Gestational Surrogacy involves the surrogate being only a carrier for the intended parents’ fertilized egg, resulting to no genetic connection.

Knowing Surrogacy Services and Legalities

Being aware of the basic laws and procedures regarding Surrogacy in the US is not enough since its legality is still an ongoing discussion. In addition to having surrogacy legal in some states, it is actually the regulations bordering the process that complexes the matter.

The Key Aspects and Guidelines of Surrogacy Agreements

Coming up with a rock solid contract or agreement will require the aid of a professional legal representative. It is required for you to provide all the necessary information that will guide whoever you will hire to represent you and your surrogate, which is this case, should be different.

Below is a quick list of the items to consider in reaching an agreement with the woman carrying a surrogate pregnancy.

1. Name of the intended parent as well as the woman acting as the surrogate.
2. Must be of legal age
3. Count of attempts or efforts.
4. The method of obtaining pregnancy, like “no sexual intercourse.
5. Agreement to not attempt to discontinue the pregnancy.
6. A declaration that the mother is unable to conceive or keep a pregnancy.
7. Statements of extensive clinical and mental state of the woman who carries the intended parents’ baby as agreed.
8. Medical insurance for all parties, including the embryo.
9. Modern technology procedures, including the positioning of fertilized egg(s).
10. Identification and observation of the surrogate’s activities or vices and taken medication.
11. Agreement on regular prenatal health care and treatment.
12. Restriction on activities of the surrogate that might be regarded as hazardous to the pregnancy and delivery of the baby.
13. Parental rights of surrogate.
14. The presence of the parents during the course of childbirth.
15. Agreement on custody after birth.
16. Financial conditions before, during and after pregnancy.
17. Confidentiality agreement.

This list is extremely helpful and will equip you with what you actually need to know at the very least. However, it is advisable to not overlook other factors that may come into play in this process.

Legality Issues Post-Birth Adoption

Several states allow the intended parents’ name to be on the baby’s childbirth certification. In other states, the surrogate’s name is the one written on the birth certificate, which may be changed later when the order for the intended parent comes and gets listed.

Some states permit pre-birth sequence under specific conditions. What is truly important is to understand the laws of each state with regard to surrogacy.

How To Select A Gestational Surrogate in Wisconsin

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For most couples, starting a family is as easy as 1-2-3; but, for some, they may opt to choose a gestational surrogate or a surrogate carrier. So how does a couple select a gestational surrogate?

A gestational surrogate is defined as a woman bearing the child for another couple or single parent who wishes to have a child; but can not bear to go through the process of a normal pregnancy. However, choosing a gestational surrogate has a course that usually has to be followed. Still, it is always a good idea to consult with your own preferred doctor.

Choosing the Right Agency for You

A couple or single parent usually has an ideal surrogate carrier in mind. Before this, the first step would have to be choosing the right agency for you. There are many agencies that offer this service so always choose the one that you feel most comfortable with. Always remember that this will be the agency that you will have to work alongside with for the next 12 to 24 months. Do your research; make sure that the agency is well established. Read feedbacks from other couples or single parents who have already used the reason and the service why these couples or single parents chose them in the first place? It is always best to trust your gut instincts.

Selecting A Gestational Surrogate

After choosing the agency to work with, finding the right candidate for the gestational surrogate is the next step. The ideal candidate should have had at least one successful pregnancy, with no background on miscarriages, abortions, bleeding or any other medical issues that may be a risk factor. It is always best to consult with your OB/Gyne or reproductive endocrinologist regarding the medical history of the GS that you plan to work with. A thorough medical examination must be performed on the GS so that any complications may be prevented. This will include, but not limited to: a physical examination, laboratory examinations, ultrasounds, a comprehensive medical history check, psychological examinations, and screening for any threatening diseases.

The Ideal Gestational Surrogate

The gestational surrogate should ideally be drug and disease-free during the pre-natal and post-natal stages, and between the ages of 21 to 40 years old. If you or your partner chooses to go through in vitro fertilization, make sure to choose your preferred Reproductive Endocrinologist.
In Conclusion

The process of finding the right gestational surrogate may take some time. Remember that using the service of a GS is not for everyone; there will be a lot of emotions that will run through your mind.

A gestational surrogate is defined as a woman bearing the child for another couple or single parent who wishes to have a child; but can not bear to go through the process of a normal pregnancy. Choosing a gestational surrogate has a course that usually has to be followed. After choosing the agency to work with, finding the right candidate for the gestational surrogate is the next step. The gestational surrogate should ideally be drug and disease-free during the pre-natal and post-natal stages, and between the ages of 21 to 40 years old. The process of finding the right gestational surrogate may take some time.

Communicating with your gestational surrogate.

Intended Parents 101: Communicating with Your Gestational Surrogate

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Communicating with your gestational surrogate during the surrogacy journey is very important to its success. The surrogate agency you work with will make sure that all of your preferences are met in finding an ideal gestational surrogate to assist you. The degree of communication and relationship you want with a gestational surrogate will really depend on you and your partner’s preferences. So it is very important to be truthful with your agency when disclosing this information.

After you have disclosed your personal preferences on the type of relationship and communication you want with a gestational surrogate, your surrogate agency will match you with a gestational surrogate who shares the same preferences with you and your partner. If you would like to keep your relationship with your gestational surrogate on a more personal level – meaning you want to have a close working relationship with open communication – your surrogate agency will find you a gestational surrogate who wants the same type of relationship.

If you prefer a more “business like” relationship with your gestational surrogate, your agency will pair you up with a suitable gestational surrogate who shares the same preferences. In this scenario, your agency will be doing most of the communicating with your gestational surrogate and will be informing you of any doctor’s appointments or checkups that you may want to attend with your gestational surrogate.

Communicating with your gestational surrogate is now easier than ever thanks to the services of a reliable surrogate agency. Remember, a good surrogate agency should be able to provide excellent services and support all throughout your surrogacy journey. They should be able to assist you in any way possible to make the journey a lot easier and more stress free for you and your partner.

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Communicating with your gestational surrogate.

Surrogates in Wisconsin and Their Relationship with the Intended Parents

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Surrogates in Wisconsin and their rapport with the intended parents is exclusively unique in its own way. Mounting a rich understanding of your expectations of the relationship and allocating those specifics with your surrogacy agency and each other is important.

The prime areas to focus discussions about your surrogate relationship concerns are regularity of communication, types of communication, and the overall tone of your personal relationship. This relationship can be reflected many different ways or you may indicate that you do not wish to have a relationship. Every intended parent’s approach will be different, as will that of the surrogates in Wisconsin.

Relationships evolve and change over time. Being aware of this creates a balance with your surrogate mother, enabling a healthy relationship to develop and grow.

Surrogates in Wisconsin must have a balance of communication between themselves and intended parents. It can be a delicate process involving each of you. Determining the amount of communication and gaining an insight into the surrogate’s expectations should be carefully considered. Some intended parents like high levels of interaction, regular updates via e-mail or phone, and the expectancy of attending the doctor appointments.

It is extremely essential to some intended parents to be included in the pregnancy. Similarly, some surrogates in Wisconsin also desire this close bond with their intended parents and may be disappointed if the intended parents choose not to engage in regular contact throughout the journey and beyond. Many choose to have a life-long friendship even after the birth.

A small percentage of intended parents and surrogates in Wisconsin feel compelled to have a small dose of contact such as quick updates and texts or phone conversation. Before entering into a surrogacy agreement together, it is important that several discussions take place as to the desirable amount of communication that will take place throughout the pregnancy and beyond.

It is important to talk with your partner about what type of relationship you would like to have with your surrogate before, during and after pregnancy. There are so many advantages and disadvantages to both options. The final decision ultimately rests on your shoulders and your personal preferences.

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Gay Intended Parents 101: Simple Ways to Bond with Your Newborn

Intended Parents 101: Simple Ways to Bond with Your Newborn

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One of the major fears gay parents face is whether they will bond or connect with their newborn, but most intended parents don’t realize that this is a very common worry amongst all types of parents. Here are some helpful tips and ideas to help gay parents bond with their newborn baby:

  • Before your newborn arrives, it is best to join a support group or a network with other gay parents that have tried surrogacy. The more you are able to talk through your fears, learn suggestions and hear stories from other parents, the more you will be prepared and have reasonable expectations of the initial months with your newborn. Reading books on parenting and watching DVDs or TV programs will help you feel ready when your newborn is placed in your arms.
  • Once your newborn arrives, it is best to focus on nurturing and meeting the baby’s needs. This is one of the main ways that parents and children bond to each other. You and your partner need to pay close attention to the nurturing tasks you are doing for your newborn, like feeding, changing, dressing and holding. By coming to your child when called and when you are needed, you will build trust and a feeling of safety which is at the basis of bonding. Responding to your baby’s cries or perceived “neediness” with consistency, love, and gentleness will let them slowly know that you are the parent and you can be depended on. For babies, dependency is a good thing.
  • Talk to your newborn. Language is a key element of connection and will help your baby in his development. Even with a newborn, it is important to talk and sing and coo and use your voice to share information and emotion. You can talk while you are doing care-taking tasks, talk about what you’re doing, and talk while you’re taking a walk. Even though you may think your child doesn’t understand you, you are conveying attachment and sharing information when you talk to him or her.
  • Play. Play is one of the joys of both parenthood and childhood. Before you know it, your newborn will be in the terrible teens and you will miss the days when you were his or her favorite playmate. For infants and babies, traditional games like peek-a-boo and singing games are wonderful ways to interact and bond, as well as teach your baby.
  • Touch. This may seem like a no-brainer, but touch is a key element in attachment and bonding. With an infant or baby, you will be holding your child to feed, rock, and comfort. A thousand words of comfort and security can easily be conveyed to your newborn through touch.

These are just some of the simple ways gay parents can bond with their newborn. By learning all the important skills new parents need to care and nurture for their child, you can easily build a lasting bond with your newborn baby.

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7 Critical Personality Traits A Surrogate Should Possess

7 Critical Personality Traits A Surrogate Should Possess

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As intended parents, you want to find the best surrogate mother for your surrogacy needs. Due to the growing number of people experiencing infertility in the United States, surrogacy has become more widely recognized, and more women today understand the concept of surrogacy and want to help others by choosing to be a surrogate. But with the increasing number of surrogates, it gets difficult to choose the right one for you. To help you get started on this wonderful surrogacy journey, here are a few characteristics you need to look for in a surrogate mother:

  • Honesty. Intended parents need to be able to trust their surrogate completely. A surrogate mother should be honest with the intended parents that chose her to work with them. All questions intended parents might have should be answered truthfully. Honesty is the most important part in any surrogacy relationship and greatly helps with its success.
  • Reliable. A good surrogate should be reliable with the intended parents. The surrogate mother should always make herself available for her intended parents or surrogate agency. Since the surrogate plays an important role, intended parents need to know that they can depend on their surrogate. To be a surrogate means being both reliable as well as professional.
  • Healthy. A good surrogate mother should not just be healthy enough to carry a child to term. She should have a good medical history meaning she has no chronic illnesses like cancer, diabetes and heart disease. In order to be a surrogate, she should have a good mental history meaning she has no history of mental illnesses such as depression, chronic anxiety and bipolar disorder. She should also maintain a healthy lifestyle by not smoking, drinking or using drugs.
  • Good Communicator. Surrogate mothers should be very vocal when communicating with all involved parties including intended parents, the surrogate agency and the medical personnel. She should provide regular medical updates to the surrogate agency and to the intended parents. She should also alert them if she has concerns about her health or the status of her pregnancy. The surrogate should be able to respond honestly and promptly to both the surrogate agency and the intended parents during the process of surrogacy.
  • Intelligent. A surrogate should be smart enough to understand all the processes involved with surrogacy. She should be able to comprehend all the important legal aspects like the surrogacy contract and relinquishing of all her legal rights to the child. She should also be smart enough to understand all the medical procedures that she will undergo and follow the medical instructions precisely rather than making her own decisions. An intelligent surrogate knows all her responsibilities and understands the gravity of what she will be doing for the intended parents.
  • Nurturing. A good surrogate mother should be nurturing, which means choosing what is best for the baby over what she may want to do. Since the surrogate mother will be carrying the intended parent’s child she should give it the same care as they would during the pregnancy. She should know how to take care of herself and the child she is carrying for the intended parents. A nurturing surrogate mother should be eating healthy, getting enough sleep and making choices that are best for the baby.
  • Responsible. A good surrogate mother should be responsible in her actions. She should follow through with instructions that she is given and be able to complete any tasks that are assigned to her by the intended parents, the surrogate agency or the doctor’s office. A responsible surrogate does what she is told without needing to be reminded. She should act responsibly in informing everyone involved if she has medical concerns.

Knowing for yourself these 7 important characteristics to look for in a surrogate will greatly increase your chance for a successful surrogacy journey. To be a surrogate mother, they should be professional and have the integrity that is embodied by these 7 characteristics. It is vital to identify them in a potential candidate prior to selecting her as your surrogate. A surrogate who possesses these qualities will not only give the intended parents a healthy baby but also a wonderful surrogacy journey.

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